Finishing First

I used to be obsessed with the idea of finishing first, whether it was an exam paper or race. I'm naturally a very competitive person. I never participated in something for long if I didn't come out in the first batch, hence I quit athletics. The older I grew, the obsession took a different shape. I still wanted to be first but I wanted to be the first who had done something, more so at a young age. All my goals had this aspect, and the older I'd grow having not achieved that goal, I'd feel defeated.

According to my goals timeline, I'm supposed to be working on my Masters Degree in Theology now. I should have published at least two novels, and fully independent. None of that has happened and I'm not bothered one bit! (okay, maybe not so true with that last one, living at home sucks.)
Why, you ask? Because I've learnt that life isn't a competition. It might be a race, but it's a marathon, not a sprint. And I've also come to know that you aren't considered a winner by how fast you ran, but how well you ran. It's not about when you get there, it's about getting there.

That's what we learnt through Paul. He was the last apostle, so last and late that someone had already taken his place when he came, making it very hard for him to be accepted as one. On top of that, he had a record. Sure he was smart and well-versed when it came to religion but he was doing it the wrong way by persecuting the Church. This delayed his start again because people were afraid of him when he came preaching to them.
On the other hand, the "super apostles" were far ahead of him. They had been with Jesus for the first three years of their ministry, receiving their internship straight from the boss. They received the power to do their work at Pentecost and they were already well known and established by the time Paul came along.

At first Paul seems to have struggled with comparing himself to them but he soon got the hang of things. He understood that in the race, he was running his own course.
"I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith" 2 Timothy 4:7 (KJV)
In a way, Paul is acknowledging that  in the race, he was running in his own track, unbothered by the next runner.  What mattered was that he ran his course well and that he finished.

I then thought of the parable of the the workers in the vineyard who were all employed at different times but received the same pay at the end of the day. When the ones who were hired first complain to their employer, he uses this phrase in his response: "So the last will be first, and the first will be last."
Basically, the lesson is, it doesn't really matter who starts or finishes first, what matters is getting the job done. It's about doing what you were born to do and doing it thoroughly, running in your track  so well that whether time is for or against you, you exit the world having finished your course.