Thoughts and Other Things

A week ago I had the privilege of speaking to a group of matrics at their farewell event. It was so beautiful, had me thinking back to mine; shock of my life when I realized it was five years ago. Anyway, I had to put together a profile so that they’d introduce me before I spoke and as part of it I mentioned one major weakness and one strength of mine. My weakness: time-keeping. If you know me, you’ll know that I’m almost always late for almost everything. I lost count keeping track of how many times I got called to the principal’s office for lateness during my schooling career. See, lateness is hereditary to me. My father is late for everything…work, church, doctors appointments, special events, name it. The man was late for his own wedding. I always tease him with that he’ll probably be late for his own funeral too. But anyway, all generational curses are broken through the blood of the Lamb, so I’m free; I’m just stuck in the process of fully exercising that freedom. My strength

They usually say one shouldn't open for him when he comes knocking because, well, he has nothing new to say. But he didn't come knocking you see, I bumped into him, right in the middle of a conversation, I met with Yesterday. But today was different. When my mind immediately told me to turn and run, to run and not look back; I did, but I had only ran one step when I suddenly stopped. 'For how long will you run?' a voice asked. 'As long as I have feet' I answered in a heart-beat. But I knew very well the essence of that question, and I hadn’t given a worthy answer. So I turned back. Today I met with Yesterday, and he still had the ability to make me cry. Yes, he no longer has a grip on me, but he still knows which buttons to push. He knows of my new status, made new in Christ, but still he brings with him gifts of tormenting memories that seek to lure me back and cause me to doubt the person that I am, the person I've been made into by the power of the Al

I was reading up on a Bible character I usually overlook because like her husband, I’m rather captivated by her sister. Leah. Her name means ‘wild cow’. Like on top of her eye problem, such a name though. I too would have huge insecurity problems if I were her. But they say her parents weren’t being cruel or anything, Rachel’s name means ‘ewe’, a female sheep. Must have been a trend those days to name your kid after an animal. But still I’d rather be named after a female sheep than a cow, a wild one nogal . Anyway, what attracted me to her was how alike we were, though it was hard to admit. Firstly, Leah had appearance issues which I don’t think would have been so much of an problem if her younger sister Rachel wasn’t so unnecessarily pretty. Look how the verse is written; the notion of comparison in the verse is probably a reflection of the comparison that existed between the two sisters in real life. “Leah’s eyes were weak and dull looking, but Rachel was beautiful and attractive.”

So…it’s September. Three months and a few days away from 2015. Sounds like a bad joke when I look back at the past months and the things I haven’t done, yet; and the things I’ve tried and failed at. It’s actually quite funny how life works. You can plan something to the dot, and when life happens, you will be so thrown off course you won’t even remember where the dot was in your plans. But I’m learning to just get used to that, to manage it, and to keep moving (emphasis on the ‘learning’). One thing I’m striving to hold on to is this thing of not giving up on what you want, no matter how much it may seem as though it doesn’t want you. It’s just a matter of time. Sometimes we want the right things but at the wrong time. What’s important is not to stop wanting it, no matter how long it takes to get to it.  ‘Cause if you stop wanting, you stop living, you just exist. ‘Cause living is about having something to look forward to, something to pursue, something to get up out of bed for. Lose

You know that thing that you can tease your siblings all you want, but when someone else does it, your claws come out? Isn’t it beautiful how we instinctively protect each other in a family. You don’t even think about it, you just know it’s your job to look out for them, younger or older, whether they’re right or wrong, at fault or not, you’re still got their back, dark or blue. Well, the same should be said for God’s family, the same principal should apply amongst sisters and brothers in Christ. It always gets to me how God reacted to Adam and Eve’s mistake. Those two didn’t even understand the depth of the mistake they made, but God did and understanding it He could of just let all of His wrath loose on them and leave it there. But he didn’t. Yes He dished out the consequences of their sin, and yes He did banish them from the garden, but look what He also did. “The Lord God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife and clothed them .” Genesis 3:21 I was exploring the issuing of

Paul Crouch 30/11/2013  Nelson Mandela 5/12/2013  Vuyo Mbuli 19/05/2014 Maya Angelou 28/05/2014  Eddie Zondi 16/06/2014  Robin Williams 11/08/2014 The legends are falling. There’s probably more than these, those that I’m not familiar with, but these are ones I’ve known to have revolutionized the fields they functioned in, leaving behind big shoes to fill, if they can be filled at all. Hearing of Robin’s death when I woke up this morning, I heard it again. That call, subtle, but loud enough if you’re careful to listen. That call calling for the legends of this generation to take center stage. Those of the previous generation are slowly but surely leaving us, waving us goodbye, at the same time seeking those they’ll leave the baton behind with. Will it be you? I grew up around the jams of Brenda Fassie, MJ and Whitney Houston. All gone. Too soon some may argue, but they were here, they’re gone now, and they left their mark. Not only to look back to and admire, but also to build o

I love crime-everything. Crime movies, crime series, crime fiction, you name it. I guess it’s the police blood in me. My all time favourites include The Italian Job, Takers, Rookie Blue, The Mentalist, NCIS-anything, Flashpoint, and any work by Michael Connelly. One thing you’ll find in almost all of these is one rule: the law always wins, no matter how good the criminal is, no matter how far or how long they run; the law will eventually catch up with them. I found it to be the same with God. It is plain silly to run away from an omnipresent and omniscient God like ours, but that doesn’t stop us from attempting it. Ask Jonah. The Bible puts it plainly that the guy was running away from God and I believe that some of us are Jonahs' on the run in some or other area of our lives. Jonah ran away in the area of an assignment, you and I might be running in another area; consciously disobeying God wanting to see how far we’ll get before He catches up with us. Well, another thing the Bib

People generally have a problem with God’s choice. Be it God’s choice of timing, God’s choice of calling, or God’s choice of people. When I was a teenager, I was convinced I was swapped at birth at the hospital cause my parents were worlds apart from how I saw things. They didn’t understand me, so I said. I grew up to realise that parents are generally the problem when you’re a teenager, no matter which pair you have. I still complain to my friend Sam that I should have been white, well cause I feel I should be married by now (she says at least I came close – Cf my complexion, lol.) And for some time, I struggled with God’s choice over what I should do with my life. Accepting God’s choice is generally a struggle because God doesn’t reason the way we do, He doesn’t see things the way we do, His thoughts and ways are higher. We sometimes see this weakness in the Church pertaining the people God chooses to use. You know I think people would be more comfortable if preachers and teache

This other time my pastor asked the congregation who had prayed for him that day. Less than five hands went up out of a crowd of above fifty. It made me feel sad. I was reminded of this as we read Ephesians 6 in our Bible Study tonight. “ Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.” (verse 19-20) The general perception is that if you’re called to do something then you’re good to go. You don’t really need assistance cause that’s what you’ve been created to do. But this is not the idea that Paul gives us here. This guy was highly anointed, gifted in many ways, and powerfully used by God to pen down the greater half of the New Testament. This great guy needed the prayers of those he ministered to in order to be successful in what he was called to do, great as he was. This is part of the mystery of how God

One of my greatest Achilles' heel in reading my Bible is stopping every time I come across a passage which explores or reveals love. What intrigues me is that it’s such an endless subject, it is God Himself after all. Every time I read about it I’m guaranteed to learn something new. This time, Elkanah’s love got to me. “ Elkanah her husband would say to her, ‘Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don’t you eat? Why are you downhearted? Don’t I mean more to you than ten sons ?” 1 Samuel 1:8 You see the thing that makes loving people the job it is, is the fact that people are imperfect. I read through 1 John 4:20 the other day, and I realized why God pushed us so much to love our brother whom we see because we’d be liars to love Him who is unseen yet hate our brother. And the issue here is that we see our brother, we seem him with all his faults, weaknesses and imperfections. Admit it, walking in love is not a walk in the park, be it with a fellow Christian at church or your family at

Speaking about the past is usually spoken against in order for more focus to be put on the present and the future. But I think we all know that the past is quite important, it has a direct impact on the present which has a direct influence on the future. I was sharing with the church the other day how God made it a point to remind the Israelites of their past. He set up feasts and occasions to be held and celebrated among them in order to commemorate specific events, such as their Exodus from Egypt. He did this knowing the mind’s weakness; its ability to forget the good of yesterday yet quite good at holding on to the bad. He knew He was going to bless them so much that they would forget the bitterness of their past and that could put them at risk of abusing the sweetness of their today. On that note, I want to tell you about the wonderful day I had yesterday. Two events which significantly moved my heart, and I’ll forever treasure them. Yesterday I had the opportunity of fellowshipp

Last night I was suffering from the most insane case of insomnia. After tossing and turning for two hours, I gave up on sleep and grabbed my Bible which I always sleep with (which explains the condition of its pages). I had been intrigued by a rather not-so-popular Bible character while going over my school work so I decided I would do a quick study of her. Michal. Saul’s younger daughter and David’s first wife. You see like most church folk, I only knew one thing about Michal, she scorned David when he was dancing before the Lord and therefore had no children. But there’s more to this Bible character, more before that incident. Their little love story had me amazed; not at all like any of the other ones in the Bible because Michal was the one who first showed interest in David. “Now Saul’s daughter Michal was in love with David, and when they told Saul about it, he was pleased.” 1 Samuel 18:20 This phrase “was in love” is the same one used to describe how Jacob felt about Rachel in

God’s ability to forgive is unfathomable. Last night’s Bible study session was so eye-opening to me. If God only had grace, I wouldn’t make it into heaven. But because He has mercy, I have hope. Grace is what saved me (Eph. 2:5), that voluntary intervention that God made prompted by this uncontrollable love He had for me, even when I didn’t love Him yet (cf.* Rom. 5:8; 1 John 4:10). Titus 2:11 says “For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men.” One of my Bibles beautifully defines grace as ‘the undeserved love God gives through Christ for salvation.’ The purpose of grace is to save. Of course this is not the sole purpose of grace and the term ‘grace’ is used in different ways throughout the Bible (cf. 1 Cor. 3:10; 2 Cor. 2:9; Col. 4:6; Heb. 4:16; 2 Pet. 3:18). But I want us to focus on this purpose of grace to save. So here I am, saved by grace, in a living relationship with God, freed from the power of sin, but then I fall into sin. What now? Grace has alread

We’ve all come to terms with the fact that not all things in our lives will happen over-night. We’ve grown to realize that sometimes we’ll miraculously leave Egypt in one night but sometimes we’ll take forty years to get into Canaan. So we’ve learnt that we need patience as a fruit of the Spirit because we’ll have to wait for some miracles. But the issue is not just the waiting, but how we wait. Just a day ago God impressed in my heart the issue of waiting without anxiety for His promises, He said “anticipate without being anxious”. He was re-teaching me a few things about His promises concerning offering and it really refreshed my spirit. To anticipate is to expect something; and this is the life of faith, we live constantly expecting the answers to our prayers and the fulfilment of God’s Word in our lives. We live like the disciples after Jesus had ascended into heaven. They had to wait in Jerusalem for the promise of the Holy Spirit; not knowing when and how He’d come, but they k

One thing I learnt early this year is that God will close some doors. I know the ‘general Christian formula’ is that if doors open it’s God and if they close it’s the devil. We give that fallen angel too much credit. A story I like in the Bible is that of Elijah in 1 Kings 17; not his popular encounter with the widow at Zarephath, but how he got to her. “ 5So he did what the Lord had told him. He went to the Kerith Ravine, east of the Jordan, and stayed there. 6The ravens brought him bread and meat in the morning and bread and meat in the evening, and he drank from the brook. 7Some time later the brook dried up because there had been no rain in the land. 8Then the word of the Lord came to him: 9“Go at once to Zarephath of Sidon and stay there. I have commanded a widow in that place to supply you with food.” Last year I had the privilege of sharing the gospel and discipling at a few schools in my area. Evangelism is something quiet close to my heart and I had prayed and God had open

Last week, God reminded me something. He reminded me how when I really desire to do good, He is faithful to provide all the resources to meet that desire. I had a deep desire to do something for a church sister of mine, but my finances weren’t being favourable. I went ahead and made all arrangements, prepared to spend my last in order to do this good deed. On the morning of the day I was planning to go shopping, God provided, with more than what I needed. I ended up not spending my last. I realized after all this that there are so many things we plan to do, and things we claim we want to do but just don’t have enough time, or money, or skill. We postpone and put them off for some unknown time in the future. But one thing this year has thought me, having buried two church members since it began, is that time belongs to no man. If I really want to, I will, regardless of time or money. If it is a good desire, God will grant me what I need to bring it to pass. Take that man in John 5 for

Heard a pastor say ‘if you’re somewhere and you don’t know how you got there, you’re lost’. He explained his statement saying that God directs (the steps of the righteous), and if you got there by luck and not by direction, it wasn’t God. I liked this statement, made me think of the workings of faith. Just the other day we were doing an autopsy on the faith of those who’ve gone before us (Hebrews 11). We have so many nice but unbiblical beliefs and statements in the church these days, all cause we’re too lazy to read our Bibles. Of course God will blow your mind by taking you to places you only dreamed of, but trust me, you’ll know how you got there, even if He did it overnight like He did for the Israelites. As much as they were in awe of how they came out of Egypt in one night after forty years of slavery, they knew how it happened. They knew about Moses’ talks with Pharaoh, about the plagues, about that Passover meal they had last before the left. They had directions. And whe

The question is so exhausted I’m not even gonna try answering it. But it’s always so interesting the definitions people give to this four-lettered word. For one, my ten year old sister says ‘love is a happy emotion.’ I’ve once asked my Sunday school class the same question, the answers were hilarious and some very confusing, like ‘love is to love something with your whole heart’. But truth is, some of us, older and supposedly wiser, can’t really define it. Maybe that’s just what it is, undefinable, greater than words, beyond description. What I want to share with you is the different types of love, maybe that will inform your definition. The Bible languages (Hebrew and Greek) speak of different types of love. I’m not too familiar with Hebrew, I only did Greek in school. I've read a little on it and learned that these three loves are pretty much the same in both languages. I’m going to try my best to share my knowledge without giving you a lecture. (Although I’ll be speaking of Gr

A church-sister of mine went to be with the Lord a few days ago. Through her, God taught me an awful lot about self-righteousness. She was not a perfect person, no one is, but my religious self tended to forget that, and so I didn’t treat her the way I should have all the time. But I’m so grateful to God for the opportunity to put my religious tendencies aside and love her purely in the past few months before she kissed this world goodbye. When I heard she had passed, I thought of a poem I was read, one I want to share with you. Its author is unknown; I came across it in a book by Nancy Van Pelt, ‘To have and to hold: a guide to successful marriage’ (don’t ask why I was reading this book, lol). This poem needs no further introductions, nor does it need ending comments, it just hits home all by itself. Here it is: Not Judge Too Hard (Unknown) Pray don’t find fault with the man who limps  Or stumbles along the road, Unless you have worn the shoes he wears  Or struggled beneath his lo

So my face has decided to hate me. My skin is just in its own world, somewhere amongst those teenager planets. Pimples, marks and spots…that kinda thing. And no thank you, I have taken enough advice as is. I drink a lot of water (okay, maybe not a lot). I’m working on not touching my face every 5 seconds and I’m using a very good (and expensive) skin care product. But that’s not the point, point is, my face got me down in the dumps when it came to my self-esteem. I felt ugly. Your face is the very first thing someone sees when they see you, and when it acts up, it makes you feel very uncomfortable around people and just generally unhappy with your looks. So yesterday while washing my face, I asked myself: am I beautiful? And my poetic heart responded. It said: Not because of a flawless-radiant face, not because of the colour of my skin; No, not because of the style of my hair, even not because of the shape of my figure. None of these things make me beautiful, they are only a shadow of

Goodness, I’m taking so long with this, many of the people I’m writing to are long gone, lol. Forgive me. So I’ll just squish the last three points in this one post. 3. Choose them right One nice thing about going to tertiary, is meeting all these different people from all these different places. It’s an exciting thing. And the process of choosing friends from among these many strangers can also be exciting. But don’t get too excited and just choose anyone you run into. Friends can be very influential, so you have to make sure that those you choose are going in the same direction as you, so they won’t influence you out of your path. Remember what Paul said in Corinthians about how bad company corrupts good character? Keep that in mind. 4. Keep watch – don’t let your guard down At any stage of our lives, we are never above temptation. It’s more intense when you’re ‘alone’ in a ‘new place’. You might be pressured by the fact that you’re the only one ‘living right’ among so many people

2. Get rooted Fellowship is a very important part of your faith. The early church was excellent in this practice; the Bible tells us in the book of Acts how the believers joined together constantly in prayer (1:14) and how they were all together in one place on the day of Pentecost (2:1). But my favourite one is Acts 2:26 “Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts”. I believe this is why this church was so strong and God was able to use it so much, they knew the importance of fellowship. Being part of an assembly allows growth which could have never come had you been alone. By this, I’m not underestimating God’s ability to speak to you alone, but you have to remember that the body is made up of many parts, and for that reason, we need each other. I love 1 Corinthians 12:21 “The eye cannot say to the hand, ‘I don’t need you!’ And the head cannot say to the feet, ‘I don’t need you!’ The

I had it in my heart to share a few things with the matrics of the school I minister at concerning the transition from high school to university, but things didn’t work out as I planned, so I’ll use this platform to share my heart and hope it gets around. This is also just in case your mamma and papa forget to sit you down before you leave…a few important things to remember when you’re Christian and independent. 1. Tell them all It’s so important that everyone know that you’re a born-again Christian. We all know and love Matthew 5:14 but I like verse 15 more. “Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house.” Put your light on its stand when you get there, don’t be silent about your true identity, let it be the first thing people know about you. They may forget your name, but don’t let them forget you’re Christian. I don’t mean this in an arrogant manner, but I’ve learnt that this helps so much when

ONE YEAR LATER THERE WAS SO much noise in those two living rooms Mpilo couldn't hear herself think. The dining room had been turned into a hair and make-up station and the sitting room a changing room. The door which led to the veranda at the end of the passage between the two living areas was left half-open for air, the weather forecast said it would be a maximum of 30 degrees that day. She sat on the piano stool with the closed piano in front of her, on it a big square mirror. Through it, she could see everyone. “But who gets married on Christmas Eve?” Samantha complained as she searched through her make-up kit for blush amongst the many items on the table. “Says the lady who got married on Valentine’s Day” Mpilo forced to speak while mascara was being applied to her eyes. “Shh” said the make-up artist. “But it was a beautiful wedding, a beautiful beach wedding” Norah said from where she sat in the sitting room having her ice tea, already dressed in her lilac two-piece whic

My pastor started his end-of-the-year sermon with a very interesting statement (and a lot of what I’ll say is extensions of what he said): ‘there is nothing new or different about 2014’. You should have heard and seen the gasps and confused looks in the audience. He went on. 2014 is identical to 2013; it has 12 months, 365 days and 24 hours in a day, just like 2013 and the year before it. He then explained that no year is different from the other, the only difference is us, the people who exist within it. It’s not about what happens in a year, but what I do with that in that year. I thought this was pretty profound because as he spoke, I was reminded of something the Bible says which sounds quiet familiar. “What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun. Is there anything of which one can say, ‘Look! This is something new’? I was here already, long ago; it was here before our time.” Ecclesiastes 1:9-10. My mom always talks about