Today I met with yesterday - a prose

-
They usually say one shouldn't open for him when he comes knocking because, well, he has nothing new to say. But he didn't come knocking you see, I bumped into him, right in the middle of a conversation, I met with Yesterday.

But today was different. When my mind immediately told me to turn and run, to run and not look back; I did, but I had only ran one step when I suddenly stopped.
'For how long will you run?' a voice asked.
'As long as I have feet' I answered in a heart-beat.
But I knew very well the essence of that question, and I hadn’t given a worthy answer.
So I turned back.

Today I met with Yesterday, and he still had the ability to make me cry. Yes, he no longer has a grip on me, but he still knows which buttons to push. He knows of my new status, made new in Christ, but still he brings with him gifts of tormenting memories that seek to lure me back and cause me to doubt the person that I am, the person I've been made into by the power of the Almighty One. Still he brings with him the feelings of shame and guilt that are as heavy as a yoke on my fragile shoulders.

Today I met with Yesterday, and it dawned on me what I would be had it not been for the cross. I saw the news headlines with my name, the wanted posters with my face. I saw it all as I looked him square in the face, as I looked into his dark eyes. But something burnt in my eyes as I looking into his, I thought it was all the crying, but it wasn’t. It was the light in my eyes, the Light alive in me.

Today I met with Yesterday, and yes I cried again. But today it wasn’t because of his torment but because of the realization of the way Mercy had rewrote my life. He paid a visit hoping to draw me back, hoping to see me crumble, little did he know that he was pulling me closer to the One who changed it all.

Rejoice not when you see my tears oh Yesterday, they are not of sorrow, but of the joy that fills my soul when I see how far I've come. Yesterday, you will never win.
(P.S I’m done running).

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Very First Time

-
Image
I remember the first time I rode a bicycle - I was nervous but excited. Dad would hold my bicycle so I wouldn’t fall. I was so scared that I made sure that he did not to let go, but somehow, when I was paying more attention on my footwork and road ahead, I noticed that he wasn’t there anymore. I looked back and saw that he was no longer holding me. My heart begun pounding - I knew that since he let go the potential of me falling off and getting injured was greater. I felt safe with dad near, but now he had let go.  But I didn’t fall (at least not that day). I got the hang of riding a bicycle, but my dad had to let go and let me be on my own so I could learn.  Growing up I didn’t mind being surrounded by people, whether my family or people at my church because I felt comforted knowing that I was not alone and that I wouldn’t ‘fall’ because someone was always around to hold me up. This made me very dependent. As a last born (the treasure of the family if I might add), when the t...
Read more

The Gift and the Giver

-
Image
God is dealing with me about keeping my eyes on him for my provision. I’ll need to give you the back story to get me, so please bear with me. I’ve always wanted a bursary (cause wow postgraduate module prices guys). Problem is, bursaries in Theological studies are as scarce as ants in winter. This meant I was limited to apply for the bursary my institution offers to all students of any faculty. But when I started my first qualification with the university, I couldn’t apply for this bursary in the first year because I had done my undergraduate qualification with a different institution. Going into my second year, I was optimistic as I applied for the bursary and hopeful that I’d be able to take on more modules without worrying about the funds. I didn’t even get a response to my application. So that meant leaving the most expensive module to do in my third year, where I also applied for the bursary and was ghosted. I had lost all trust in the bursary department and wouldn’t be able to af...
Read more

A Stranger's Voice

-
Image
The story of Elijah in the first book of Kings is such a clear reminder of just how listening to any voice other than God’s can displace us. After listening to Jezebel’s threat, Elijah ran for his life. In Horeb where he ends up, God repeatedly asks him: “ What are you doing here, Elijah? ” (1 Kings 19:9,13). God asks this question because fear, which came as a result of listening to a ‘stranger’s voice’, had displaced Elijah.   In previous chapters we see how Elijah’s steps were ordered by the Lord. Elijah was always where God wanted him to be because he was following God’s voice. After delivering a prophesy about the famine, God directed him to the Kerith Ravine where he would make divine provision for him. Following the drying up of the brook there, God led him to go to Zarephath where again he would be divinely provided for through a widow. When it was time for the famine to end, God again gave instruction to Elijah to move – to go present himself to king Ahab. Elijah alway...
Read more